A Series of Bad Boyfriends
I have a big heart, am very empathetic and need help. I have been searching for a loving relationship where I am fulfilled. I am financially stable and independent, and want a partner to share my life with. I have had four serious relationships where all four men have quit their jobs. When they quit, I would have been happy if they helped around the house, like fixing things or cooking dinner. I think resentment builds when I am working full time and not getting any additional help.
The first relationship (marriage), the individual did nothing to help once he quit. I worked 60+ hours a week and was sick most of the last year. The second relationship, he quit to help his dad. We did not live together, but it ended when he cheated. The third relationship was a little more difficult. Twice I dreamed I met a man with an amputated leg. One of the dreams was a past life in India. I then met him the next month, so it was hard not to believe my dreams were signs. He was fired. Next, I ended up helping him build a business, took care of him through multiple leg surgeries, and helped his three young daughters get their abuser out of their mom’s house. I paid all of his bills, including child support for a couple of years. I have no doubt I was put in his path to help his daughters and would not change that for anything. The fourth, he quit a good job and he did help some, but some things I paid for him. He could never tell me he loved me, and we parted ways.
In the meantime, I have a great friend I dated, and we continue to cross paths. I offered to try a long-distance relationship, but he wasn’t willing because he had been burned in the past. We don’t live in the same state, but I feel like he is a soulmate.
Do you have any advice if I will meet my soulmate? Am I always going to attract broken men? Do you have any thoughts on why the pattern keeps repeating or what I need to learn from it in order to move on?
Psychic Kallista ext. 9623 responds:
You truly do have a big heart. You are incredibly giving, generous and kind.
It’s no accident that you went through everything you did. You offered these men a chance to rise up and meet the Divine light you sensed in them. Ultimately, they could not live up to it and you had to release them. You are right about that man’s daughters; you fulfilled a karmic promise by helping them, and you’ve added more stars to your karmic crown. Thankfully that promise is completed and all of those soul obligations to everyone that you helped, are now behind you.
You learned so much about yourself along the way. You discovered strength and resilience many people don’t have. Your patience, empathy, and soul-growth benefitted immensely from these experiences. While you can be a wonderful caregiver, what you need is an equal partner; someone who can take care of you, too. You recognize that, going forward, you can no longer do all the giving while others do all the taking. They drained you energetically, emotionally, financially and in every way imaginable. You know you deserve better.
We have many soulmates in each lifetime, but often we are only with some of them to learn and teach one another for a time and then move on, as you have done with each of these men. My reading shows that although those men thought they could take advantage of your giving nature, you are now done with the users, emotional and financial abusers, and takers. Announce this inner conviction to the Universe. It will hear you.
It will be better to keep your long-distance soulmate friend as just a friend. You would not be happy in a long-distance relationship. Even if he lived closer to you, he shows as unable to give you, or anyone, what is needed to have a thriving relationship. It looks like he will be this way for a very long time.
While it makes you feel good to give, from now on, any man lucky enough to be with you must give at least as much to you in return. You will make this clear as you watch for any red flags. For example, if he were to show signs of quitting his job, you’ll make him understand that he’d better find another one, and fast, or he’s out. It sounds harsh, but that is how it must be. This includes emotional giving as well. He must meet you at least half way in all things, or you’ll quickly leave him behind.
One way to attract a man worthy and deserving of you is to summon him using a very effective mantra: “Right man, come to me.” In addition to often repeating this mantra in your mind, write down what you want and need in a man. Think of it as your Universe Order Form and list all the qualities and characteristics of your right man. When you are finished, because the Universe may have something even greater than what you’ve asked for, write at the end of your list: “This, or something better.”
You have a wonderful soulmate coming to you this year. He will be your husband if you so desire. He has an inner core soul strength much like you do. He did not have an easy childhood, but this helped make him a better man. He has a good job with no plans to leave. In fact, he is a kind of boss there. He’s got a good heart like you and he just wants one good woman to settle down with, and it looks like that will be you.
Call him in. It won’t be very long before he answers your heart’s desires. He will remind you often of how blessed he is to have won your heart and your hand. He’ll be right.
Wishing you every beautiful thing in the Universe,
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2 thoughts on “Psychic Q&A: How Do I Break My Bad Dating Pattern?”
Hello, i need help i never been in a relationship before ive never dated im 26 , i just moved out on my own 4 months ago im ready for love and to find someone to share my life with but im confused i dont know what or how to go about it
I have been single for over 5 years now. Dating different men here and there but none seem to really want something real. I am so tired of being alone but don’t won’t to settle. Is there someone out there that wants more than my helping heart or just sex? All I want is to be loved and appreciated.