Red Responds: She Has Had Numerous Failed Relationships

Denise in Crystal Lake writes:

I have been divorced for about two and a half years, and ever since, have been through numerous failed relationships. I have no problem attracting men, but just can’t seem to hold on to them. Last fall, for the first time in my life, I thought that I met ‘the one’ — I was absolutely blindsided when he dumped me. I still don’t have much clarity or closure as to what really happened. I recently met someone, and once again, poof! Gone! There is also another man who has weaved in and out of my life for a year and a half, and although the relationship is very casual, I had a vision of us getting married. I know that I’m in a ‘lessons phase,’ and I’m obviously not picking up on the messages being sent. Could you please shed some light on what happened with ‘the one,’ and if I will ever meet a compatible companion. Thank you

Dear Denise,

One the hardest lessons to learn, is that not every connection is meant to last a lifetime. With you, things have a way of moving a little too fast — like the relationship with the man you met last fall.

You don’t have any clarity or closure to your whirlwind relationship because there isn’t a deeper meaning to the ending. This man, who we’ll call Frank (not his real name), has a bit of a history of running when things get serious. He’s not a true player by definition, but he does know how to rope in a woman, and then disappear.

Looking at your casual relationship with the man we’ll call Joe (also not his real name), I’m not seeing a marriage for the two of you, even though you have had a vision. While he is going to continue to weave in and out of your life, I don’t see you agreeing to marry him.

The men are going to continue to come in and fade out around you, but you will find the companion and lover you are looking for. There is a marriage in your future, but it’s about three years down the road. This relationship will also move forward quickly, but because both of you want the same thing. As soon as your fifth date, you could be picking out wedding rings!


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